Digital Estate Planning

- 4 minutes read - 800 words

CWs: death, morbid, finances

I’ve been thinking lately about contingency plans. Specifically, what to do with the remnants of my digital life if (let’s be honest, when) something happens to me. That includes taking down this server, deleting online accounts or transferring ownership, and basically closing everything out. My spouse is comfortable with tech, but I wouldn’t say they’re “techy.” I have them set up on Bitwarden at the very least, to help with stronger passwords, and that is about the extent of it as far as involvement with this server. But my stuff is all over the place on here, and on the internet in general. There are subscriptions that would need to be cancelled (Patreon, &c.), and accounts (like utilities, &c.) that are in my name. I have recurring bills each month, whether it be my bank account or credit card, often accessed via PayPal and such. All of that will just keep going, ad infinitum/ἐς αἰεί, until it’s shut off or my accounts run out of money.

Hence my thoughts about closing everything down. I need a plan in place so my spouse knows what to do, especially given my myriad of passwords, 2FA, and other safeguards in place keeping things running. My spouse could keep the server open, but I don’t think they’d want to deal with upkeep, techwise or financially, and that’s fine. So in the past couple of days, I started drafting a document I’m playfully calling “further instructions.” I tried to lay out exactly what needs to be done whenever I depart for oblivion.

Some main points:

  • I set up my spouse with Emergency Access to my Bitwarden vault; it’s set up essentially as a “deadman’s trigger.” If they request access and I don’t deny within 7 days, my vault is automatically turned over to their control.
    • Bitwarden needs to be accessible so they can export the vault, at the very least, and have access to passwords.
    • Once the vault is exported and passwords are accessible, the server can be dismantled
  • I recommended doing a full OS reinstall on this VPS, which means all data will be deleted
  • From there, they can cancel my VPS service which should close the account
  • They should be able to access my laptop and phone and pull off whatever is desired, and wipe it from there too
    • I have a USB backup drive that also needs to be wiped
    • I prefer using shred to securely delete files and wipe disks

After the server is shut down, other accounts need to follow:

  • Patreon subscriptions need to be cancelled and the account closed
  • I have some other sites with monthly support, which also need to be cancelled/deleted
  • From there, I advised just going through my Bitwarden logins, and closing/deleting whatever they can
  • Credit cards and bank accounts need to be closed

I see all this as a kind of living document, a first attempt at a digital “will.” Not so much in terms of who gets what; basically everything would go to my spouse. But we do need to set up a traditional will as well, for sure. Never too soon to start on that.

My goal in all of this is, again, to make sure that everything is sorted out when I’m no longer around, and no superfluous bills are being paid, nor is there any superfluous data floating around in the aether about yours truly (to whatever extent it is possible to remove those things, I suppose). It’s not super easy to think about all of this, but I feel like it’s necessary, the older I get. I want to be prepared, as prepared as one can be at least. I am grateful that Bitwarden has the Emergency Access system; that way I don’t have to share anything of my vault with my spouse unless something catastrophic happens. I don’t want to know their passwords and don’t want them to know mine, y’know? But once the vault is open, they can take care of everything else, and the document is intended as a guide to help with all of that.

Have y’all thought about this at all? Do you have a trusted person or persons to share this sort of info with? I think it’s extremely worthwhile. I am hoping none of this needs to be used for a very, very long time, but nothing is guaranteed. I am trying to enjoy every day and hang in there and just appreciate it all.

I hope this is helpful in some small way, sharing my experience with all this. It is something I’ve thought about for a long time but never put “pen to paper,” so to speak, until just recently. But I think it was a helpful exercise to lay some groundwork. Thanks for reading, friends <3